From Friends, Ross dates a girl with an extremely dirty apartment.
[n] - noun, [v] - verb, [phv] - phrasal verb, [adj] - adjective, [exp] - expression
Cheryl: Um, would you like to come in?
Ross: Did homo-erectus hunt with wooden tools?
Cheryl: According to recent findings!
Cheryl: Here Mitzi! Here Mitzi!
Ross: Mitzi is.....
Cheryl: My hamster. I hope she's okay, I haven't seen her in a while. Have a seat.
Ross: Uh... Oh hey, do you, uh ...do you have any, um, Cinnamon Fruit Toasties?
Ross: Well, I do! Why don't we go back to my place, light a couple of candles, break open a box of Cinnamon Fruit Toasties, uh...
Cheryl: I'd rather not.
Ross: Oh, yeah, why not?
Cheryl: Okay, um, don't take this the wrong way, but your place kinda has a weird smell.
Joey: So, you just left? Her place was really that bad?
Ross: You know how you throw your jacket on a chair at the end of the day?
Ross: Well, like that, only instead of a chair, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of a jacket, it's a pile of garbage. And instead
of the end of the day, it's the end of time, and garbage is all that has survived! Here.
Joey: Wow. Thanks. So, uh, what happened?
Ross: What do you mean? Nothing happened! I had to get out of there.
Joey: All right, so... next time, you take her to your place.
Ross: No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell.
Joey: What kind of smell?
Ross: I don't know. Soap?
Joey: All right, listen, Ross... you like this girl, right?
Joey: You wanna see her again, right?
Joey: So you're gonna have to do it in the mess!
Ross: Yeah, okay you're right.
Ross: I mean, uh, who... who cares about a little sloppiness?
Ross: It's, uh... it's endearing, really.
Joey: All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! (Ross hesitates, looks unsure) Oink!
Cheryl: So you want to come inside?
Ross: Yes. Yes I do.
Cheryl: I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable.
Cheryl: Guess who?
Ross: Department of Sanitation?
Cheryl: It's me!
Ross: Oh! Ah. Aw!
Ross: Ah, Cheryl!
Cheryl: Oh, Ross!
Cheryl: Wait! No! No! It's my hamster! It's Mitzi!
Ross: Oh my god! I'm so sorry, Cheryl. I must have freaked out.
Cheryl: Oh, thank god, it's not Mitzi. It's just a rat.
Monica: Hi. Uh, you... you don't know me, I'm Monica Geller... Ross's sister.
Cheryl: Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out.
Monica: Yeah. Anyway, he told me about your apartment. And, um, I couldn't sleep, thinking about it. So, uh, would it be okay if I cleaned it?